Hello I’m Jessica Hylands Life Coach.

How good are you at developing positive habits?

Often the intention doesn’t reflect the reality.

It can seem like a hard slog to change the way that you act, speak and think.

The starting point is going to be to look at which habit that you want t change.

Is it to give up smoking?

Is it to treat people more nicely?

Is it to stop worrying about money?

To stop feeling jealous of others

There are a million different things that we may be experiencing that is causing us to feel less than happy.

The first step in changing things is to recognise the thing that you want to change.

And that may not be as glaringly obvious as you think.

For example, it irritates you that your partner goes to the gym three times a week. if you look more closely you might find that the issue you have with it is that it’s costing £200 per month for them to continue with it. It’s actually the money that is the issue for you.

Or maybe you know that so-and-so goes to that gym and a tiny little part in the back of your mind that you’re not even consciously aware of, is telling you that your partner would fancy them if they happen to meet.

So in that instance it’s jealously or insecurity that is the issue.

Or maybe your partner is getting more fit and toned and if you’re honest with yourself, it’s highlighting to you that you could do with getting a bit fitter and more toned.

So in that case the issue with your partner going to the gym is more about how you feel about yourself.

In any of those cases the habit that you want to change isn’t being annoyed with your partner for going to the gym three times a week, but it’s about money, jealousy, insecurity, disappointment with yourself.

So, find the real thing that you want to change.

Once you’ve found it, you need to look at why it’s a problem for you.

So why aren’t you getting yourself fit and toned? It’s unlikely to simply be about laziness. There will be a reason lurking underneath that’s stopping you.

Like, can I do it?

Will people laugh at me trying?

If I do get fit and toned, does that mean I’ll have to socialise with others at the gym (that might be a horror for you).

So get to the bottom of the real reason that it annoys you that your partner is going to the gym and then you’ll be well on your way to stop it from being a problem for you.

In turn it will change that negative habit of getting moody whenever you’re partner gores to the gym.

The same process of course with whatever it is about yourself that you want to change.

Step one, is get to the bottom of it.

As ever if you’d like any help with this then please do get in touch.

We can have a chat to see what’s going on for you, talk about how I can help and see where you want to take it from there.

Otherwise I wish you all the best in sorting it out and changing your bad habits.

Thanks for listening.

Bye for now!