Have you just about had enough?
Work is too stressful.
The kids don’t respect you.
Your partner never listens.
These things may be true and indeed need to be addressed, but sometimes, the answer is easier than you think.
If your basic needs aren’t being met, EVERYTHING else becomes a challenge.
Are you getting enough sleep?
If you’re dieting, are you getting enough fuel?
If overeating is a habit, is too much of your energy being spent trying to deal with the overload on your system?
There can be lots of reasons to feel that you are at the end of your tether, but this feeling will be a symptom of other things, not an issue in itself.
While the root cause does need to be resolved, in the meantime, look at how you can make your day-to-day life easier.
What would replenish you?
A walk in the country?
Skipping through the rain in bare feet?
Luxuriating in peace in a hot bath – and if this means taking an hour off in the day to do it when the house is quiet and empty, then maybe you can organise this.
Treat yourself to whatever will lift your spirits.
When you read the words ‘Treat yourself’, what is your response?
Do you think ‘Yeah right!’
And if so, what does that ‘Yeah right’ mean?
Does it mean that you haven’t got the time?
Or does it mean that you don’t feel you’re worth it?
If the former, think again.
It may feel difficult to justify taking time for yourself when there are so many others things that need doing, but that isn’t the same as not having the time.
If you have a pet or a child and they got ill, would you take them to the vets / doctors?
Or would you find yourself saying ‘That will have to wait because I haven’t vacuumed upstairs yet.’
Of course you wouldn’t think that.
You would grab them and get them sorted pronto.
You'd find time for that.
It’s a clear cut contest between helping someone you love who is ill, versus getting the vacuuming done.
OK, so being stressed isn’t the same as being ill (yet …… It will catch up with you), but you don’t have the time to do anything about it?
What we mean by ‘don’t have time’ is that we are prioritising other things.
And that's not the same as not having the time.
So, the two most common reasons for not treating yourself are:
1. You don’t have time.
2. You’re not worth it.
Having established that not having time isn’t a valid reason (ie we can find time if we really needed / wanted to), it must mean that you don't think you’re worth it.
You can find time for a loved one in need, but not for yourself.
How come you don’t warrant the same attention?
Don’t you matter?
Of course you matter!
Maybe others are telling you that you don’t matter.
Not in so many words…..
Perhaps your partner wouldn’t be too pleased to hear that you’ve ‘wasted’ a couple of hours doing 'nothing'.
The message received here may be that you don’t deserve it.
You do deserve it!
Not only do you deserve it but you need it.
Time to relax and treat yourself is a necessity not a frivolous ‘want’.
Do you imagine that you can continue at full pelt in your life without suffering any ill effects?
I’m guessing that if you’ve got this far in reading this article that you are someone who doesn’t give themselves enough attention.
Make it your responsibility to look after yourself.
It may be that no-one else will insist that you take time to replenish your emotional and energy supplies.
I’m giving you permission to recharge your batteries!
If you need any further convincing then look at the oxygen mask analogy:
If you don’t look after yourself (ie put your own oxygen mask on first) ,you may not be able to look after anyone, or anything else very effectively.
So, taking time for yourself to relax and enjoy the moment is not a luxury, it’s a necessity.
Spending some time doing this on a regular basis will make you feel calmer, more in control, and more able to cope with whatever is in your path.
Once you are feeling more in a state of calm, it will be easier to look at all areas of your life with better perspective. You can then clearly see where the problems are and what you need to do about them.
In itself this will make things less stressful for you.
I do hope you manage to juggle your diary to fit in some ‘me time’.
It will be worth it.
Please do get in touch if you are finding this difficult as I do appreciate that it may go against the grain for you, and therefore be hard to implement.
Let me help you re-balance your life.
Do get in touch for a chat.
Look forward to speaking soon!
Look here ....... one for FREE and the other for FREEDOM!
by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach