Category Archives: Confidence

Confidence is key to everything.
How you feel about yourself will be reflected in what you do, what you don’t do, who your friends are, what you achieve, absolutely everything.

Poo

What has poo got to do with confidence?

Maybe nothing

But I'm on a quest to save the planet! 

Every little helps and this one is really close to my heart.

Animals are dying because of the plastic poo bags full of doggy do-do that are left lying around.

I can't get my head around how people will leave full bags in the park, in the woods, and on the pavement.

If there's no bin, and it's not appropriate to 'stick and flick', take your poo home! 

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I've even seen someone throw their bag into a hedge walking down the street.

They were probably a matter of metres away from a bin.

Even if we responsibly throw them in a bin, it's still more plastic going into the system.

Imagine how much plastic you use for one dog over the course of a year.

There are apparently 8.9 million dogs in the UK.

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If everyone switched to my method that might save the planet

 6,497,000,000 poo bags

every year.

That is not an insignificant amount.

Please join me by using old newspaper.

If you don't have a dog, please do share this with any of your friends that do.

 Let's do our bit!

Thanks a mill for reading. I really appreciate it 🙂  

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Look here ....... live the life that you want!

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

Why does confidence matter?

Does it matter? Really?

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Surely you can fake it...

Yes you can fake it but where does that take you?

Does being confident mean that you're the first one on the dance floor?


Does it mean that you can ask someone out on a date without much fear?


There are lots of ways that we can define confidence but real, true confidence is in how you feel about yourself.


If you don't love yourself and feel good about who you are, then you can pretend to be confident as much as you like but it won't help you to feel any better.


I hope that you gain some insight through this video into how confident you really are.


Does the result surprise you?


I'd love to hear how you get on!


Do get in touch for a chat if I can help with anything.


Look forward to speaking soon!

Links from the video:

To get your photo judged:

https://www.photofeeler.com/

David Green Photographer:

https://www.shootmenow.co.uk/brighton-headshot-professional-photographer

Video transcript

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

How good is your life?

Are you happy with all areas of your life? Some areas? Or none?

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If the latter, how long has this been going on?

Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.

Is that good advice?

In terms of making changes within yourself then yes it’s definitely good advice.

We can make up a lot of reasons as to why we should put off doing something:

I haven’t got the time.       Does it really matter?           Will it work?

confidence-coaching-jessica-hylands

These reasons are excuses that we make because we don’t want to do it.

You may not want to do it because you tell yourself that it won’t work.

Maybe on a deeper level you’re worried that it will work ….and then what?

Your whole life will change!

How will you cope?!

If you could wave a magic wand and have some changes already made within yourself or your life, what would it be?

 Would you be fitter?

Smarter?

Have a better job?

A nicer partner?

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Wave the magic wand and consider it done.

So it might take a bit longer than waving a wand in reality.

Let’s say it takes you six months to achieve it. A year even.

Won’t it be worth the effort over that time in order to have the rest of your life being a shining version of what is now?

It will be wonderful to have a life that you love rather than feel is ‘OK’.

Sometimes it’s better that it takes a while to make the change rather than it being instant with a magic wand (assuming for this example that there is such a thing!).

The reason for this is that if we could make changes instantly it might be that we make the wrong change and in the longer term we feel the same, or maybe even worse than we do now.

It can take time to know exactly what it is that we want. 

Sometimes the thought of achieving what we want can be scary. This can be enough to put us off starting it.

Don't let it. 

When the change is made over time, you are adjusting inside along the way so by the time the change is complete, you are ready for it.

You aren’t changing from the person you are today, straight into the person that you want to be.

You aren’t changing overnight from someone who’s too scared to speak to people into someone who is happy to be the life and soul of the party.

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Doing it overtime, you will gradually change

The bottom line is that if there’s something that you want in life that you don’t have at the moment, whether  that’s a better paying job, a better social life, a partner, or a fitter and slimmer body, now is the time to start making that change.

The best time to plant a tree is ten years ago or today….

How big will the tree of your dreams be this time next year….?

Do get in touch for a chat and let's see what we can do about it.

Look forward to speaking soon!

Video Transcript

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

Living true to yourself is the way to happiness

Happiness is being 'YOU'

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Who is the real you?

Do you know the real you? 

You may have spent so many years being this other person that you're not sure who you really are.


Why did I never pursue my dream to be a dancer / accountant / artist / solicitor?


Think about that.


What was the reason?


Fear? Laziness? Or did it not occur to you to take it seriously?


It's important to live the life that you want.


If this feels out of your reach, it isn't.


You can do whatever you want to do.


Step 1: Think about what you want to do / be. Work-wise, socially, spiritually, anything.

Step 2: Think about why you haven't done it up to now.

Step 3: Grab that reason and dissect it. Really look at what it means. Uncover what's behind it and holding you back.  


If this is too big a step for you to do alone, do get in touch for a chat.


Otherwise, I wish you all the best with whatever you discover and get rid of!


Look forward to speaking soon!

Video Transcipt

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

Will you do it?

If you want to do something, who do you tell?

Jessica-Hylands-life-confidence-coach

Who you choose to tell could be a critical decision

Have you ever had the experience of being really excited by the idea of doing something?!

You mention it to someone and they give you every reason as to why it's not a good idea.

Oh No! 

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There can be a lot of reasons as to why others might discourage you.

If you ask one of your parents whether something is a good idea, their reply might be tempered by 'Is it dangerous?' 'Will they get hurt?' 'Will they like it?'

If you ask them whether moving away from home is a good idea they might say 'No!' because they fear they won't see you often enough.

If you ask a sibling whether moving away is a good idea, they may say 'Yes!' because it means they'll get the bedroom (or car) all to themselves.

Everyone has their own agenda whether they are consciously aware of it or not.

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Their advice may not be affected by their own agenda but by their assumptions:

A friend may say that starting a career as a vet is a bad idea.

They may have in the back of their minds that time at Girl Guide camp when you were petrified of a hedgehog. They don't consciously remember the incident but just remember that you and animals aren't a good mix. 

There are many many reasons as to why someone might discourage you from doing something.

Not all of them mean that you shouldn't do it. 

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Be careful who you share your ideas with until you've thought them through.

If you have an idea about doing something, whatever it is, however big or small, think about it.

Go through the pros and cons yourself.

You will know what constitutes a pro or a con in your eyes. 

Then come to your decision before speaking to anyone else. 

For sure, check through things with others.

Get some feedback.

But if you've been through the whole thought process yourself then you will be ready for the comments that might otherwise have put your off. 

You'll be ready with answers to any possible objections that might be raised.

Naturally, if there are reasonable objections that you should look look at then do so.

Otherwise,

Do it!


If it doesn’t work out, they may say I told you so, but if you hadn’t tried it, you wouldn’t know how it would turn out.

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It’s OK when things don’t work out.


As Edison would tell you, when asked if you’ve failed, you say ‘No, I haven’t failed, I found the way that doesn’t work’.

Another person's reservations about going ahead, aren't yours.

If you want to do it, do it.

When you tell a child not to do something, very often they will do that very thing, because they need to see for themselves what will happen.

The same applies to us as adults. We can’t always learn through other peoples experiences.

Do your research, check your actions are reasonable and if they are, do it.

If it doesn’t work, try something else.

Being the real you and doing what you want may feel a daunting prospect if you've spent years being the person that others think you should be. 


We are only likely to regret the things that we didn't do, not the things that we did.


Do get in touch for a chat if you'd like any help.


Look forward to speaking soon!

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

How happy have you decided to be?

Life-coach

Happy as a

Spring lamb!

Most people are as happy as they want to be.


That may feel a bit harsh if you are in the midst of a bad time.


But I'm afraid it's true.


We can tell this by looking at different people in the same  circumstances.

One being happy and one not.


It's usually because the happy person has decided that they aren't going to let the situation worry them.

 

The unhappy person can't see past the horrible stuff and so feels bad.


To hear that our happiness is in our own hands can sound

FANTASTIC 

or catastrophic...... 


Fantastic! because we're in control and can do something about it.

Catastrophic because we're in control and can do something about it.


..... Hmmmm


It may seem daunting but it really is good news that we are in control of it.


It may not be easy, but you can do it.


Give it a go.


Try seeing something small in a positive light first and see if you can work your way up to seeing bigger things more positively.


I do appreciate that this is far from easy but it will be worth it.


Do give me a call if you'd like to talk about how I can help,  otherwise I wish you all the best in changing your mind about things and becoming happy!


Look forward to speaking soon!

Video Transcript

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

What are you like?

What you think of yourself will impact greatly on every area of your life.

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Do you love yourself?

Loving and liking yourself may not feel easy with all that stuff from your past weighing on you


Let's talk.


Bye for now and speak soon.

Video Transcript

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

Will you do what you want to?

What do you want to do?

You may have had a dream for years without having got around to doing anything about it

A dream is a goal without a plan

Or is it more than that?


Is a dream with no plan, a sign that there is a hurdle in front of the dream that you aren't recognising?


If this is the case, what can that hurdle be?


What hurdle do you have to get over before you can make this dream a reality?


I hope that is video sheds a bit of light on things for you.


Look forward to speaking soon!


Bye for now,

Transcript of video

Look here ....... one for FREE and the other for FREEDOM!

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

What is confidence doing for you?

Is confidence that important?

"I've got through life quite happily so far 'faking' it."

You may well indeed have got through life without having real inner confidence.


It's like a bar of chocolate.


 Or a cream cake.


 Or whatever your favourite treat might be. 


How can confidence be like a bar of chocolate?


It's like it in the sense that you didn't know how good chocolate was until you tasted it.


Or butternut Squash.


Or whatever makes you go "ooooooo!"


The same applies to feeling confident inside.


You've got by quite happily in life without having inner confidence.


but

 on a scale of 1 - 10, where is your happiness?


If you've always lacked self-confidence then on your personal scale, you may feel it's a 10.


You've never felt better than this so it must therefore be a 10.


Mustn't it?


But once you've tasted chocolate and you know how good it is, your 'getting by' score may now seem like a 5.


Have a think about it.


Do you want to live your life on a nice steady 5/10 or would you rather have the feelings that go with a 10/10?


For me, being confident means that I feel whole.

I feel worthy.

I feel lovable.

I trust in my choices.

I can make decisions easily. 


How would you describe it?


Would you like to be a 10/10?

 

Do get in touch for a chat and let's get started!


Look forward to speaking soon!

Video Transcript

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence

How to know if you’re confident

I'm the life and soul of the party. 

Of course I'm confident!

Does this demonstrate confidence?

Very often the loudest person in the room is the most insecure.


Do you distract others from seeing your insecurity by giving them something else to focus on?


It feels as though a good way to prove our confidence is to do things that we imagine confident people would do.


Stepping up to the plate in whatever situation you're in.


Do you find yourself acting confident when it's not really what you're feeling inside?


If so, have a think about that.


The insecurity that's causing you to act in this way will be affecting lots of areas of your life.


It's difficult to be happy with the weight of insecurity burdening your every day .


Think about what's at the bottom of it.

 

When you find it, that's where you need to focus.

 

Clear that and all will become calm!


If you need any help with this then please do get in touch.

 

Look forward to speaking soon!

Look here ....... one for FREE and the other for FREEDOM!

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by Jessica Hylands Confidence Coach

#lifecoaching #confidence